PROOF READERS WHERE ARE YOU, HELP!

OK, SO YOUR A PROOF READER YES? I HOPE SO BUT THE THING I NEED TO KNOW IS CAN YOU HELP ME GET PUBLISHED TOO? I HAVE THESE BOOKS THAT HAVE A STRANGE TWIST TO EACH AND EVERY ONE. BUT THE THING THAT PLAGUES ME IS THE FACT THAT MY GRAMMAR REALLY SUCKS AND MY PUNCTUATION SUCKS JUST AS BAD. I CAN COME UP WITH STORIES AND POETRY AND ANY LITTLE THING YOU COULD POSSIBLY WANT TO WRITE ABOUT. I HAVE IN ME THE STORIES THAT WILL MAKE YOU SMILE, MAKE YOU SCARED, OR JUST MAKE YOU WANT TO LAUGH, BUT WITH MY GRAMMAR, YOU'LL SMILE BECAUSE YOUR SCARED TO LAUGH. IT'S JUST PLAIN AWFUL. I REALLY NEED SOME HELP AND I AM OPEN TO ANY CRITICISM THAT WOULD HELP BUT MOST OF ALL I NEED YOU (IF YOU CAN PROOF READ) I NEED TO GET SOMETHING PUBLISHED SOON I'M TRYING TO DO THIS FOR MY WIFE IF ANYTHING. THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENTS AND TIME.