DON'T WANDER YOUR LIFE AWAY

Another day in my life about to come to a close.  Like so many days prior....dejavu.  Lord God, I know exactly how the Nation of Israel must have felt wondering in circles for forty years searching for the promised land.  It's very hard to stay focused and keep the faith when your health is wavering and life's circumstances seem to be overwhelming.

Mighty God you knew my journey, all the twist and turns, the dark moments and so many unanswered questions.  My prayers lay before your altar, each and every one.  My flesh cries for deliverance, my mind yearns for peace, the peace that only Jesus can give.  Why do humans constantly look to man and his prescriptions for 'happiness'?  Take this pill, exercise more, watch your diet, change your lifestyle, but all this doesn't address the real illness....it's your heart!

It seems like only yesterday I was a teenager and forty years have flown by.  Not much different from Moses and Israel, praying everyday, trying to live a Godly life, but the wilderness of my mind offers up one doubt after another.  Where are you God?  Have you brought me out in this desert of a life to stumble endlessly, then die?

I read ;your word and read books about your awesome miracles in people's lives and I'm in awe.  I believe everything, as much as you Holy Spirit enables me to understand.  I don't question any miracle, because I believe my God is capable of everything and anything.

The attacks I withstand daily hinder my walk with you Father.  Yes I do question salvation, what believer hasn't been to the place where prayers have been offered for months or years and still the onslaught continues.  I believe in my heart that our trials serve a far greater purpose than we can understand.  Father I want to please you, not by haughty conversation, a Holier than thou attitude, a prayer made for the sick, I want my mind and heart to be pure and righteous in your sight.

My life is laid out before you, nothing hidden, no, not one little dirty detail.  You've seen it all, the ugliest, the most vial, the self condemnation and you saw it before the beginning of time.  Sort of frightening Lord, born and the slate had already been painted on.  First the picture of childhood innocence, than a young person's mischief, then a teenager's exploration into everything Satan cared to entice us with.  If you made it through those years in one piece, what have you learned?  Who has your heart been listening to?  Who have you established as your God....Jehovah or the world?  If the truth be known, the majority would have to say the latter.  How sad that God has given us his'owner's manual' and we never open it.  The instructions are all right there, but you and I would rather build without the instructions.  How many times have you ever got that right? 

Well Lord I'm sixty years invested in this life and I find myself still wandering in the wilderness, but I know in who I believe and I know HE IS ABLE!  Lord it's been forty years, but the promised land of eternity still awaits me.

My prayer Father God....CLEANSE MY MIND, WASH ME WHITER THAN SNOW IN JESUS PRECIOUS BLOOD, ESTABLISH IN ME DEAR FATHER A PURE AND RIGHTEOUS HEART.  MAY MY EVERY HEARTBEAT BE A SOUND OF HOLINESS BEFORE YOUR THRONE MY GOD, MY REDEEMER, MY SAVIOR.  I AM YOUR VESSEL FATHER, USE ME TO BRING GLORY TO YOUR NAME....AMEN.